Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Running Guidelines

I read this article yesterday on and thought I would share some parts to it...

Running Rules of Thumb
1. If you see a porta potty with no line, use it. Even if you don't need to.
2. If you have to ask yourself, Does this driver see me? The answer is no.
3. If you have to ask yourself, Are these shorts too short? The answer is yes.
4. 1 glazed doughnut = 2 miles
5. You rarely regret the runs you do; you almost always regret the runs you skip.
6. Not everyone who looks fast really is, and not everyone who looks slow really is.
7. Nobody has ever watched Chariots of Fire from beginning to end. Not even the people who made it.
8. You can never have too many safety pins on your gym bag.
9. Running any given route in the rain makes you feel 50 percent more hard-core than covering the same route on a sunny day.
10. If you care even a little about being called a jogger versus a runner, you're a runner.

Expand Your Sense of Fun
As a runner, your definition of fun—which might once have included water parks, screwball comedies on DVD, and scrapbooking—must be, well, let's just say broadened and might include:

Waking up at 5:30 a.m. to run 10 miles
Running in the blistering heat
Running in the rain
Running in 400-meter circles
Feeling as if your lungs are about to explode
Paying good money for the privilege of turning your toenails black
Any combination of the above

Never Leave a Man Behind... Unless He Insists He's Okay with It
It's fine to ask once or twice if a straggler is okay or if he wants you to slow down for him. Asking three or more times, however, is more likely to annoy than to help. Take the straggler at his word and run accordingly.

Never Miss a Chance To Thank a Volunteer
Even if you're running the race of your life, you can still manage a bit of eye contact and a nod as you grab a cup of water from an outstretched hand. Even if it feels like your quads are quite literally on fire, you can manage to sputter a short "thanks" to the course marshal standing in the intersection. It will make the volunteer feel good. And you, too.

Before You Remove Your New Running Shoes from The Box, You Must Smell Them
Open the box. Peel back the tissue paper. Behold those pristine shoes. Then lift the box to your face and breathe deeply. Mmmm. Smells like potential. And possibly toxins. But mostly potential.

Adapted from The Runner's Rule Book, by Mark Remy (Rodale). To order your copy, go to runnersrulebook. com/mag.


Elizabeth said...

# 4, 5, and 7 would make great t-shirt quotes!

Courtney said...

Ha! #7 - I sure haven't. I can never make it through the whole thing.

Heather said...

Elizabeth- putting #4 on the back of a shirt wouldn't help me much... I need to tape it on my forehead (along with the miles for a Milky Way!)

Courtney, I fall asleep every time I watch it!

Nathan said...

I have never even made an attempt to watch that movie. I like the expand your sense of fun

Anita said...

I think we have watch Chariots of Fire 2 or 3 times!! But, then, we are not runners, either.

Catherine said...

So true,so true

Julie's Journal said...

I love it!!! I love #5. I've never seen Chariots of Fire but I want to some day! Hope to see you soon! Tell Sarah I said Happy Late Birthday!

Christy said...

Hi! I just discovered your blog :)
I made an attempt at running a little over a year ago-then got pregnant with my third child and stopped. I am starting up again and my goal is to run a half marathon next year :)
I also live in North Mississippi (New Albany) and am a Christian, mom to three, soon to be homeschooler, and wife. I will be following your blog!

Meal Planning with Connie said...

You know I don't run, but for the last 6 months I've been back walking with great regularity. I don't know why I have those slack times, because once I get back into it, I love it.
Thanks for the tips and encouragement to keep moving!!
Hugs to all ~ Connie

Whoz Your Doula said...

I will never eat doughnuts again. :)

Joy said...

Ha!! Love those. I just picked up that book last weekend for the first time. I think I learned #1 when my friend and I stood in a 45 min PP line one race...

Katie said...

I've watched Chariots of Fire all the way through MANY times.